If you’d like to come pay us a visit, we’d be happy to host you, upon prior arrangement and scheduling (Tuesday and Wednesday are best for us.) You can take the historic train route up to see us, or just rent a car and head up the interstate.
We’re just up past the Dicken’s Ranch (famous for their Dicken’s Cider, so comforting on a cold winter’s morn) along the state route a mere 45 minutes outside the city.
It’s not that we don’t trust you, it’s that our experience has taught us that your reaction to our methods may be so counterproductive to what we do that you’ll immediately pack up your junior and head home, effectively undoing all the unbelievably strict punishment we’ve handed down thus far, at your non-refundable expense.
All paid and verified members have our compound address (it was included in your welcome packet and/or email, please make sure you white-list our address so correspondence doesn’t accidentally end up in the ‘trash’ bin.) If you’ve lost it, we’ll gladly provide it again for the asking should you so much as have that very decency to ask.
We look forward to seeing you here at our cautiously guarded compound very, very soon!